Getting out there.

Last night, I attended a social function after work. I was both excited and nervous. Why? Because this whole socializing thing is difficult, but I am making myself do it. It's sort of an industry related thing where a few dozen like-minded folks got together and talked about the businesses we're in. Lots of smart, witty and some geeky & nerdy folks all around. It was good and hopefully I can establish and sustain some working relationships. I still do not have the confidence to feel like I can survive and hold my own in any social setting so luckily a couple of my coworkers went as well so I didn't have to fend for myself. I made an extra effort to look the part before I left for work, nice jeans, button-down fitted shirt, cute hair, sensible jewelry, appropriate shoes. My sister says to never leave the house lookin' crazy -- you never know when you'll meet your future husband -- so along those lines, when I do know I'm going somewhere out of the ordinary, I try to take it up a notch.

As expected, work is getting to be not so intellectually challenging. To be fair, unless you're in retail or are affected financially by the holiday season, 4th quarter is usually a slow one. I feel like I need a pet project to focus my energy on and have been trying to figure out what. I do know this, I don't think I can stay in this current position long term. It's very comfortable, but a little tedious. My day-to-day is about 5 levels below what I'm used to doing techology-wise. My options are to start learning some new skills and transition to another department or after a few more months of the good, lazy life, start thinking about a project that will eventually get me back to being self-employed. I've thought a lot about how I want my next venture to go and with whom I'd like to work so I think by the time I'm ready to make the jump, I will be much better prepared mentally for it.

I don't miss working at my business with my business partner, not at all. I hardly think about it anymore. I honestly thought I'd be dwelling on what they were doing or how things were going, but not so much. The only thing I miss is having sole control over the application I built, being responsible for it's every tweak and nuance. Much of it was a huge pain in the ass, but the software itself have big upside and a lot of potential. Too bad BP is such a loon, it really could have taken off. From what I hear, she is already starting to stress out the three people we hired to replace me. Sigh. I guess it's never ending.